The Misadventures of a Hopeful Writer

WeWriWa, I’ve missed you.

Hello everyone! Time for another week of Weekend Writing Warriors. I’ve chosen to continue the snippet from two weeks ago at this point, so I’ll refresh your memory a little. As always, thanks for checking out my blog!

 

Evie and Grey are still in the tavern and Evie’s feeling homesick, but Grey’s going to change the subject.

 

“Yes…yes I’m fine,” she muttered, catching her breath. “Just got a little lost in my thoughts.”

“Have you ever had blue fin?” He asked her simply, throwing a hand up in the air to signal the barmaid.

“I’m from a city in the middle of a land-locked country. If it’s not found in a lake, I haven’t tried it. This whole tropical environment is totally new to me,” Evie told him, pushing her blonde hair behind her shoulders. She looked around with wide eyes, the mixed population was much more diverse in a tavern, as always.

“Well, I suppose this will be a new experience for you,” he replied.

 

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9 responses

  1. This is my first visit here. What is blue fin? To me, that means tuna. But they’re in a tavern, which led me to wonder if it might be a drink of some sort. I would have liked to have seen a blurb for this story to ground me. Is this a YA sci-fi story?

    May 4, 2014 at 11:50 am

  2. burnsmillie

    Sushi : ) Wonder if she’ll like it.

    May 4, 2014 at 3:40 pm

  3. Honestly, I wanted to come up with a great name for a different kind of fish, but I didn’t want to stray too far away from what is realistic for the setting. So that’s what I went with.

    May 4, 2014 at 7:24 pm

  4. I have a feeling she’s in for a lot of new experiences LOL. Maybe call the fish some other color than blue though? Your Readers are going to home right in on the tuna thing and if this is scifi…Really enjoyed the excerpt!

    May 4, 2014 at 8:54 pm

  5. I agree with Veronica, and also agree that it’s an interesting excerpt!

    One grammatical point: Here “Have you ever had blue fin?” He asked her simply” you need to use lower case with “he” since the sentence is continuing. Hope you post more from this story.

    May 5, 2014 at 12:11 am

  6. Sounds like the start to a fish-out-of-water story (pun intended) :D I like it!

    May 5, 2014 at 3:27 am

  7. I think Lisa Medley writes great puns. ;-) lol.

    This is a good snippet, Kelly. It moves the scene along, and lets us know that she’s not local. :-) Good 8! :-)

    May 6, 2014 at 1:02 am

  8. Thank you everyone! I really appreciate the feedback, it’s so helpful :-)

    May 6, 2014 at 12:39 pm

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